Thursday, September 27, 2007

Home Un-shanti Home

Before we arrived in Pittsburgh, buying a house seemed the only good thing Pittsburgh had to offer. For the price of living in a car’s exhaust pipe in Chicago, we could get Buckingham Palace in Pittsburgh (well, at least in Boondocks Pennsylvania, which is just about 4 hours from Pittsburgh). So we narrowed in on this mansion I was talking about earlier. Chutes from bathrooms to laundry room, intercoms, deck with a slide to the swimming pool, completed basement with a bar and a mini stage to perform puppet shows. It was something I had not even dared to dream about (My dreams don’t extend as far as puppet stages). A kitchen that would make me guilty for not being Rachel Ray. It was 10 minutes from work and close to the airport and mall. It seemed a little quiet and secluded. Isn’t that a good thing for future buyers? So we were about to sign the closing papers, when I got a frantic call from my parents in India.

‘Nahiiiiin!!! Don’t!!!’

Dropped the pen to the floor where it bounced across the hall in resounding horror many times till you get the point that nothing good is about to happen.

‘Why mom? You don’t even have to go out of the house to take your long walks. In fact, we could rent the basement for the International Puppets Conference.’

'Check out Google Earth! This place is in the middle of nowhere.’

Cursing myself for teaching mom how to use Google Earth and knowing very well that this place (like every place in Pittsburgh) was exactly in the heart of some obscure forest, I looked at Google Earth.

Holy cow! The woods that we saw from the deck didn’t end in someone else’s backyard in a few hundred yards as we had hoped. This forest stretched all the way to Alaska and beyond. If a Ted Bundy lived in my back yard, I wouldn’t even know. If he brought his family to our forth room, I surely wouldn’t have a clue till I saw their undies in my laundry. Shudder! Did I mention the hidden attic?!

I do like backcountry and forests, but then too much of a good thing is not good, right? Also the dense perspective from where I was coming from needs to be considered. A aerial comparison of the Chicago and Pittsburgh.


In fact, Google Earth saved us the frightening prospect of buying that house and getting stuck with a mortgage. So instead, we now rent in an equally wooded area with no one in sight for million miles. We don’t have four rooms or a laundry chute or a puppet room. We have an escape route. We continue to pay more in rent for that peace of mind.

24 comments:

Terri said...

Wooded? It seems more like fallow earth all around.
Since there's as much room inside the house as outside, you should soon fill it with the pitter-patter of little feet ... I mean paws.

AmitL said...

LOL..Twin,I guess its good that parents are IT-literate..:) But,tell me,are estate agents there also as unscrupulous as they are in India?It certainly seems so.

Alpha said...

terri: no! this google earth image was taken in winter..hence the fallow feeling..if i was taken now in fall, would hvae been lovely..but the house probably would have been hidden too.
pitter patter of paws? that seems quite haunting.

amitl: not as ruthless, but ruthless nevertheless..that fatty never told me about the nevernever land behind the house.

Rationale said...

Were these the literary ideas you had to hold back when IL's and Mom was around? Time flies, this happened ages ago!

Wow! Is that the map of pittsburgh, or the place u considered buying at? Man! That is scary! (on the other hand, you wudnt have to pay much to do the backcountry stuff you love)

Alpha said...

rationale: true true..backcountry is literally in our backyard..i've lost all enthu for that stuff..show me pubs, crowded football stadiums and ghettos!

Anonymous said...

rationale:

"Is that the map of pittsburgh"

that must be the pit part of pittsburgh, the burgh/burrough/ghetto - i am sure - lie(s) somewhere else.

- s.b.

e said...

Goog that you have someone to watch over you then :)

Bolywood stuntwoman said...

Imagine having to retrieve a car from THAT area!!No wonder then....!

Pitts wood stuntwoman said...

Piece of cake...umm or puzzle :D!

Anonymous said...

well look at the bright side....at least they didnt convince you to empty your pockets and buy in pricey india...........hello alpha........i am back with the dots.......

m

Alpha said...

sb: :) yeah there are some decent areas

bsw: actually its very similar..

pwsw: gimme the cake anyday..

mmmmmm: great to see you...why will agents here want me to buy a house in inida..you are still into dope.you bad girl!

bloghopper said...

What is this ? You comment and then reply to them as well, just to see more comments !! Krishna krishna !!

Alpha said...

no, that was to make you comment and increase my comments.

Anu said...

heyyyy u back :) goody

its a new construction babe...thats where they make them - in uninhabited (sometimes uninhabitable) areas! ...

Anu said...

shit. problems with multiple google account.

Anonymous said...

What happened to the not parochial couple?
Did 'franship' develop?

-Sachita

Anonymous said...

sachita:

any guesses on what do you think pushed alpha (and her car) over the edge (literally)? ;-)

- s.b.

Alpha said...

anu: looks like i am destined for the old rickety types.

sachita: oh we hooked up and all...they are a fine couple if you can believe it. now the guy is freaked out about his other friends knowing the about the ad considering my uncontrollabe mouth.

sb: haha! actually living on the edge can be dangerous.

Guy said...

Now is that a shanty or a home?

Rash said...

Just very happy to know you are safe from backyard bundys, puppets and flying cars.

Anonymous said...

Alpha,
You and "uncontrollable mouth" - that is ridiculous! You did not tell anybody about the ad, did you?:)

i know you must have seen the below 2 lines quite a few times, stil.. I hit your blog few weeks ago and went through a marathon of this one as well as the earlier site. Thank you for many chuckles(at office!!!) and laughs. If you ever decide to have google adsense, I will do my part by clicking them away for all the fun.

- Sachita

anantha said...

Alpha: Hmmmm... Just miss. We could have called you "kaatuvasi"!

Anu: Don't worry. I dont think anybody guessed :P

:-) said...

Babes! Time for a new post. :-)

AmitL said...

Hey,Twin..no posts lately..did you change your blog?

This comment is to 'Wish You and your family a Very Happy Diwali and a Prosperous New Year'..let it not be even near the 'Pit(t)s'.