Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Aah, the Horror!

You know what really irks me- the fact that India's Department of Telecommunications passed an order to ISPs to block several blogs. I was hoping someone would do it here. My dream of doing something worthwhile with my time has been thwarted yet again. My way of protesting- I will put a self-ban on blogging till all my friends in India are given the right to while away productive time by blogging. If this ban is not lifted in three days, I'll rethink my protesting strategy.

Update: Unblocked. People do listen to angry bloggers! Now if I can get Pi to make dinner.

107 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ek sher arz farmaaya

Maine post likha jo - wo block ho gayaa
Waqt sahi dikhaaye jo - wo clock ho gayaa

Waah waah waah waaaahhhhh .....

B o o said...

Alpha - Infact, you should post more. I use proxy server and all(!!) and with such hardships come here to find out that you are nt going to write? Not fair! I have loads and loads of productive time, ok?! ;)

Sheeba said...

Hmm, I wonder if this has got something to do with my recently moving to Blogspot! (Errrr....)

Anonymous said...

Was just about wondering if the ISP blockage affected you too ...
Ahh Wishful thinking ;)

Alpha said...

zoheb:
frilly aur pink lage jo- wo frock ho gaya
aise faltoo shaayari se- wo shock ho gaya

boo: me is maha touched. will post like crazy.

rationale: could be..mmm...should not have made people from middle east move to blogspot!

Bh: now ur dream has been thwarted too!

fishy: Do u have any other good excuse?

Anonymous said...

"India's Department of Telecommunications passed an order to ISPs to block several blogs."

you are to blame. someone must have complained that gulab jamuns are out of the menu in their house because of you.

i know marie would say "give them rasmalaai, if they cannot have gulab jamuns" or something to that effect, but not ban blogs. one more reason why marie is better than sonia.

gulab jamuun naa milaa, aur blog block ho gayaa
rasmalaai jo khaayaa maine, man shaant ho gayaa

vaah vaah vaah!!

- s.b.

Alpha said...

s.b.

gulab jamun ki baat se, humko shame ho gaya
rasmalai khane ke baad, Pi bilkul tame ho gaya

Marie sonia aur woh, biradari mein ye talk ho gaya
connexson doondte hi, mera mann block ho gaya

Jinguchakka said...

aahaa, a novel protest! :-)
btw, recent news suggests that the indian Government didn't want all the blogs to be blocked. They gave the ISPs a list of 17 or so blogs, who went ahead and blocked the whole lot of us.

Unknown said...

Funny that s.b has talked about gulab jamuns I came here to let you know that I saw them in the Indian sweet shop today and of course I was reminded of you and then I just couldn't get myself to buy them. Thanks to you there is gonna be worldwide downfall in Gulab Jamun sales :)

Alpha said...

jinguchakka: haha! funny name..feel like saying it again and again and dancing. yeah ISPs, they meant to block only mine.

wa: Aiyoooo! Why has this gulab jamun trickled from three posts? Very soon, I'll have desi restaurants with buffet asking US govt to ban my blog. And oh btw, you better tell the sales girl (at the shop) to hide her gulab jamuns and not display them wantonly...coz u never know what is going on in Somebody's mind.

Alpha said...

ok ok..In case you like Malai kofta, rest assured you'll thank me for preventing you from indulging in such fatty stuff in future. We were at a restaurant and ordered 'Royal Malai Kofta.' We had a few Americans with us. The server got very creative when he brought us the dish. Placed it before us and said, 'Maharaja's butter balls.'

Anonymous said...

What ! maharaja's butter balls were served to you ? Now where is gabby ? Look what alpha did to your baby's balls :) *grins wickedly*

Alpha said...

bh: yikes! Goodness me! babies have balls? Gabby'll put some strange motherly curse on me now..make the gulabjamuns turn into popcorn or something!

Me said...

....oh please alpha ...please leave the food items...

Unknown said...

yes yes please leave the food items alone in future pleeeeeeeeeease.

Unknown said...

Alpha, just read the one about malai kofta. Woman, you are one gross blogger

Alpha said...

me: what! you don't want to hear about the mixed nuts and banana story? you guys have sb to blame... he's the one who loves talking abt gulab jamuns and his recent interest for white women (rasmalai).

Alpha said...

wa: see above response to me.

Anonymous said...

whoa!!!! first gulab jamun and now rasmalai. have you heard of kaalaa jaamun? that is my favourite too, though haven't had it in ages!

anyway, to get pi to cook, you should go into anshan, i.e., fast until pi cooks. though when he cooks, you might end up extending your fast (unless he is like Ballava). haah - i included the url to ensure that alpha doesn't twist the reference i made to mahabharata just because of bhima's assumed name.

- s.b.

Alpha said...

sb: man, u are a player! don't spare any race!

Ballva is dying for a dig. Is it like halwa? I really didnt click the link scared that it might take me to some creepy website.

Anonymous said...

alpha: !!!!!!!!!!!

i repeat "haah - i included the url to ensure that alpha doesn't twist the reference i made to mahabharata just because of bhima's assumed name."!!

let me say it straight: what i wrote has nothing to do with maharaja's appendages.

- s.b.

anantha said...

All galeej pasanga!

Alpha said...

anti: at least our mind is pure.

anantha said...

Alpha: Whose mind are we talking about here? The same ppl who talk about nuts and bananas and gulab jamuns and khaju kathilis?

anantha said...

And hey, the name's Anantha!

Alpha said...

anti: was going to complete the sentence when you interrupted.. at least our mind is pure ghee!

and hey, u choose, anti or savithri?

upsilamba said...

Guruvayoorappa!!

Unknown said...

yeah exactly how many times will aNTi change his name? aNTi, anti, tbfkawaetausbuauh, anantha, savithri and thats just in the last couple of months. I think this is just aNTi's strategy to hogging the limelight. Enge poi mudiyumo idhu

Grey Shades said...

:) I have a feeling thats gonna be more challenging than getting the govt to lift the blog ban!

Anonymous said...

blogspot ka waat lagaake
isp pe blame daalke
government to nahi bachega

pi se khana banwaake
humko bina khilaye
tumko kaise pachega?

Anonymous said...

CERT-IN has admitted defeat,
and Pi is making dinner.
In the whole ban episode,
alpha is the clear winner.

Anonymous said...

HaHa great rhyme K. Loved it

Alpha said...

upsi: wrong place you came to to chant mantras.

fishy: you are welcome to join the kavi sammelan going on.

grey: you are right..maybe if many bloggers blogged abt the unfairness of it all, Pi might at least cut onions.

wa: stop hidering anti's creativity with psycho ananlysis and all. You did that to me once and I have stopped going to orkut for good. now i am considering retiring..what if you say i wear different clothes to work coz i need attention. all ur fault if i end up sitting at home watching tv all day. *sniff*

rakya:
buri nazar na lagao
apni kavita bachao
khilene ko sirf hawa hai
pakane ke liye tawa hai
jab bhi chahe ghar aa jaao
hotel se garam parcel le aao.

k:
I will never admit defeat
Yes I am the clearest winner
If you want me to believe that
Come home and make me dinner

Anonymous said...

OMG. You serious? We are missing you desperately there, please come back and I promise never to say anything like that ever again (we will agree anything like what later). God promise.

Alpha said...

wa: j/k..got you..didn't i? just got busy...plus i ran out of nostril pics.

Anonymous said...

My daal is very very bad,
my vendekka much much worse.
You dont really want me to cook,
but pi you continue to coerce.

Alpha said...

k:
That was very sneaky of you
To excuse yourself and walk away
Asking me to force Pi is worse than
Having your bad food any day

I take it that you are a guy
and hence would be quite wary
In a blog such as this, saying
'my vendekka' is quite scary.

Anonymous said...

oh Alpha, please promise me you won't say gross stories about vendakka now. Please, please please

Anonymous said...

Malai kofta has gross connotations,
I cant eat any vendekka any more.
Please dont keep going with this,
or I wont be able to have any sor

Alpha said...

K:

You can live on peerpanga pachadi
Keerai, pacha malaga and more
If you keep coming here to check
Soon they'll get covered for sure

Anonymous said...

OMG idhelaam special talent, I bow to you masters here.

Kaushik Gopalan said...

Fine, you carry on merrily,
but I sincerely beg you madam,
whatever else you target,
please spare thair sadam


- The man with the really bad vendekka

Anonymous said...

rhyme vyme naakoo raaledoo
haadu-paadu nanage barallaa
if i keep reading this bloggoo
gir jaaoongaa kursee se main maashaallaa!!

- s.b.

Anonymous said...

wa says: "yeah exactly how many times will aNTi change his name? aNTi, anti, tbfkawaetausbuauh, anantha, savithri and thats just in the last couple of months. I think this is just aNTi's strategy to hogging the limelight. Enge poi mudiyumo idhu "

i zay: check this out.
no comments.

- s.b.

Alpha said...

kausikku:
Sorry about your vendekka
Hope the koftas are fine
I also love my thair sadam
styrofoam and phlegm in brine

sb:
Yem ra, yendukku aa chiaru
Kelegade biddhu yaake mate drama
Idhu puriyadunnu nalla theriyum
sirf maloom hai, 'Aiyoo Rama!'

anantha said...

Naaaansense! My name's Anantha. I have a name like no other, and so I have no other name!

Alpha said...

if you have anything to say about naan, say it now..or else yaawwn!

Kowshic said...

"styrofoam and phlegm in brine"
thair sadam down the drain!

Yekkov, edhayaum vittu vaika maatanu ninaikiren!

Alpha said...

dna, the grossest thing so far is you calling me yakkov!

Me said...

ayyo adhu peerpanga illa ....peerkanga .....& malaga illa....

btw i thot they make peerkanga thogayal....not pachadi....

Me said...

anyways am not coming back to read anything here....i have no clue how bad the reply is going to be.....

Kowshic said...

Thangachi manichukka!

Alpha said...

me: vandutanga pa..all wanabe tamil skaalars and cooks. i refuse to learn tamil from a guy who cant read and write in tamil. so i guess you wont get offended if i dont say something interesting abt peerkanga.

dna: like that ,come to way I say! before which idiotic sori dog puts kann on this blossoming relations, please to be thupping over left sholdaar..no no..waitamineet.. right sholdaar and also please to be rolling the computaar on yellow piece of circular lemon attached to big piece of not so circular alum by fat blackie rope. tank u very much.

Anonymous said...

u guys r crazy and alpha is the god-damn crazy leader.

Anonymous said...

Nera kodumai, come out of the summer party venue and what is the first thing I do even before I get home? Check Alpha's comment section :(

Kowshic said...

Apadiye, sevapu molaga, kal uppu rendayum eduthu serthu, oru karpooram ethi, adhula podu. Potutu, thirumbi parkama veetukulla po. Anda ellai amman (evanston hooters) unna enda kurayum illama kaapa!

Kaushik Gopalan said...

Vendekka is doing pretty ok,
The koftas are first class,
But after reading your blog,
i've got a big pain in the ...

Idlys, vadais, masala dosais, appams,
surely they are all fair game.
But now you've attacked thair sadam
and my life will never be the same.

Anonymous said...

bye bye jenny craig. hello alphalpha!

- s.b.

anantha said...

D.N.A/WA/Me: What are you blabbering? You know Alpha cannot understand or speak Tamil, right?

Me said...

....alpha fyi i had a test on tamil alphabets(both reading and writing) last weekend and i passed it....i will be a real skaalar soon...

Alpha said...

wa: That's pathetic. you shouldn't have even gone for that summer party..but sat and checked this comment section.

dna: lets not get carried away..nobody is dying to put extreme kann on us.

kaushik:
It all comes from over eating
Diarrhea, heart burn and gas
Reading this blog is the key
To avoid that pain in the ....

If it still persists
Eat only bread and paal
Drink lots of water
And doses of pepto bismaal!

sb: thanks for ur endorsement!

Anonymous said...

this has become a 18+ blog and a 30+ comments section.

Anonymous said...

"sb: thanks for ur endorsement!"

... only until you find something to write about alfalfa. then my endorsement might equate me to dr. k (with apologies to your european readers who might not get the context)!

- s.b.

Kaushik Gopalan said...

This diet may be good for health,
hunger I may be able to withstand,
But if I dont have a prosperous belly,
who will give me their daughter's hand?

Anonymous said...

if you seek a prosperous belly,
glug some beer and plop your rear end afront your telly,
but if you seek a jolly bride,
ask matchmaker alpha don't be tongue-tied.

- s.b.

Unknown said...

matchmaker alpha??? Do we have any success stories as a result of Alpha's matchingmaking ventures?

Anonymous said...

wa:

where were you when alpha attempted to foist sw1 and sw2 on her unsuspecting readership? when bloghoppers turned both down, she announced, unabashed, that she was going to sw3.

alpha:

on a totally unrelated topic, has pi made dinner yet? i am starved for a post.

- s.b.

anantha said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
anantha said...

WA: As if you don't know THAT story! All sham!

Once there was matchmaker Alpha,
who attempted a jaffa;
The playah knew his biz,
hit it for a six;
But when people held her culpa',
matchmaker Alpha said nary a "Mea culpa".
Days passed, the seasons changed,
but the player remained,
still ends unchanged.

Kaushik Gopalan said...

s.b. :

Im just a really poor grad student,
struggling to make even minimum wage.
If alpha manages to get me married,
it'll be the biggest wonder of this age.

Alpha said...

I take a little break
You guys are on a roll
From food to match making
Everyone is out of control

wa, how dare you doubt my skills
I have got people apart
Its better then than after marriage
before breaking their heart

kaushik, Pot belly isn't an issue
Minimum wages aint a problem sought
To get a sucker to apply
Vendakka should be mentioned not

sb, Pi isn't cooking
Cant blog when I am fam
Anti, with all those links
I thought you were spam

Anonymous said...

"kaushik, Pot belly isn't an issue
Minimum wages aint a problem sought
To get a sucker to apply
Vendakka should be mentioned not"

touche!!

i think sulekha missed a trick by not having a comments4alpha2.sulekhablogs.com

- s.b.

Kaushik Gopalan said...

The vendekka is now a secret,
that will not come to light.
The sucker will not know about it,
atleast not until the wedding night.


Now that you're on the case,
I dont feel quite so sad.
Please start with the good work,
by looking at my matrimonial ad.

Anonymous said...

Ohh .. I can almost see alpha doing a jai on our veeru who is pining for basanti !!

Shark said...

From Blog Blocking to Thair Saadam to Match Making... wow! what a connection...

By the way do you have anything for Beans? I want to make my bf stop eating them.. I hate it... ;-)

Kowshic said...

Alpha thankgachi, for the love of beans eaters, please answer shark in a private e-mail.

anantha said...

Alpha: To quote part of your silly rhyme (with some added emphasis from me),

sb, Pi isn't cooking
Cant blog when I am fam
Anti, with all those linking
I thought you were spam


There, yes, that ought to brush it up.

sb: With such atrocious rhyming from all of us, I guess Sulekha should thank its stars.

AmitL said...

Heh heh..Twin,now,u'd better continue regular blogging.As for Pi doing the cooking,good luck at finding the 'right forum' for convincing.

anantha said...

Fishy: It ain't so paradoxical when you consider that Anantha is my given name while the rest were assumed pseudonyms. As I said, the TBFKAA acronym was during my transition from aNTi to Anantha. And this was what I had planned for sometime. It was not sudden! :p

And btw, please be thankful that it was just Tamil and it was most certainly not from Alpha. People have learnt worse on here from her!.

Sheeba said...

Hey you moved again? Why u no writing? What am I supp to do when I/m bored at work now! :(

Anonymous said...

bored at work too...

Anonymous said...

after a lot of research, i am yet to find the end of the internet. alpha, please help!

- s.b.

Anonymous said...

Wassamatter, found religion ?

Anonymous said...

Alphie, ignore aNTi. I reckon with your tamil knowledge and expertise in the double entendre it appears that you will do well in the Tamil film world. Even aNTi won't disagree with it

Anonymous said...

Alpha is so busy at work that she is working weekends too. So, let us start commenting and blogging on her behalf..;-)

Aqua said...

LOL about the Pi bit :)

GratisGab said...

Whoa!!! Whoa!!! Things are outta control here...Alpha, need a referee?

Wa, Anantha and the Anon - ever thought of posting all these views on your blogs?

GratisGab said...

Whoa!!! Whoa!!! Things are outta control here...Alpha, need a referee?

Wa, Anantha and the Anon - ever thought of posting all these views on your blogs?

anantha said...

Gabby: In a fish market, if no one cleans up each evening, the dead fish are surely gonna raise a stink. You know what I am saying?

What views are we talking here, btw?

GratisGab said...

So Alpha's blog is a fishmarket now?! I can so imagine Anti in a checkered lungi :)

Alpha said...

gabby, fishy, wa or Anyone! Please dont address any comments to Anti. I cant deal with him saying something that makes no sense. I mean I do try my level best to comprehend and my hard drive just crashes like it did a few days ago.

kaushik, as much as I want to see you married off to some child bearing hipped woman, I am a few miles away from bangalore to ask thoese pretty conductor ladies about their vegetable of choice. Can you please handle this? I promise to intervene when you are deciding on the name for your kid. How does Rajnikant sound?

btw, i enjoyed playing poem poem with you for no rhyme or reason.

rationale/ chakri: That sucks. Try buying snacks and eating from time to time. thats what i do.

sb: so?

shark: other than bean paste looking like shit, I cant think of anything else. I am sure he knew it too..and would be concerned about his tastes in general.

dna: gross.

hehh: I would have, but God came in the way.

anantha said...

Chey, people are not comprehending even if speak in Englipish! So how much lower do I bend to pander to the common folk? My back's hurting!

GratisGab said...

97...

GratisGab said...

98...

GratisGab said...

99...

GratisGab said...

Hee Hee!

Don't blame me...I learned to do this from you!!!

sunshine said...

orkut influences i see!

Anonymous said...

Anantha is bending over .. any takers ?!

He he he

Alpha said...

bh, since you are the first to notice, go right ahead!

Kaushik Gopalan said...

alpha,

I didn't understand the part about child-bearing hipped women, but I enjoyed playing poem poem too.

anantha said...

bh: Very funny, that was. I am not bending anymore. I fell down so hard, laughing my posterior off that I had to be rushed to the hospital with a broken tailbone.
Yes, more reason for laughter when that happens, no? :p

Anonymous said...

anantha: I just couldn't resist pulling that one off. LOL !

Are you sure you can sit down ? Do ya need a pillow ? The poor thing must hurt a lot, no ?

*laughs heartily*

Kowshic said...

anantha, nunalum than vaayal kedum!

Anonymous said...

aNTi total total damage

Anonymous said...

Great article! Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for interesting article.

Anonymous said...

Nice Blog!